Retrospect
Posted: Monday, August 03, 2009
by Michele Winslow
The Cooks Kiosk
One day, I looked at my mother, and saw her. Not as the beautiful woman of my youth, I had always seen, but as she was...in the here and now.
One day, I looked at Mom, and I knew that only twenty-five years separated us. Like her, I had also aged.
One day, my children will really look at me, as I am, as I had done...in their now.
I use to wonder why, in a war, the generals would be thousands of miles away, while the young were on the battlefield.
As I matured, I came to realize that as youths we are brash, we think we will not die, and if we do, it will be in a blaze of glory. We will live forever...we will change the world!
Sometimes, when we tell our children things, they just look at us as if we are crazy. this will never happen to them. That was then - this is now, today. Things have changed. But often, it is the same body, just a different dress.
Funny, my parents told me things, and I felt, as the youth of today does. Those things happened in the past, things have changed, things like that don't happen or can't happen today. Boy, was I naive!
When a youth dies, doing heroic deeds, they become the stuff of legends. Were not the epic heroes of Troy young?
Alexander, The Great, who had conquered the then known world at thirty-three, would by today's standards still be a youth.
Perhaps this is where the fascination with youth comes from. We all want to be in our prime, to be young, vigorous, beautiful and desired.
Many of those we look up to, singers, television and movie personalities' keep the illusion of youth for years. As for those personalities who die young, we raise shrines to them.
When I look into the mirror, it would be nice if I saw myself as I was in my twenties or thirties, but I don't. Nor, do I have the desire for a tummy and/or fanny tuck, breast augmentation, face lift or Botox.
The very idea of intentionally putting harmful bacteria into my body is appalling to me.
I really don't mind being the age I am or looking the way I do. Winkles and graying hair, to me, is a badge, which says I have survived. Many of these I once knew are no longer here.
Over the years, I have come to like myself. I have a saying, "I like me, warts and all."
Warts...We all have things about ourselves, which we don't like. All we have to do is sit down, take a hard look, I'm sure everyone would find some trait they want to change. But the fact we do have these faults is hard to admit.
It is admitting to oneself we have these faults. Knowledge, and the commitment to change are the elements which help us control, mature and become the person we would like to be...and begin to like oneself. And, yes, it is an ongoing process.
But, life is a journey. Not only a journey through society, time and space. Most importantly, it is also a personal journey.
If I were ask for advice it would be this:
1. Parents, look at your children, enjoy them, and give them your time. For all
too soon they will be leaving home.
2. Children, remember the love, caring and time your parents give you. If the
experience was good, pass it on to your children. If it was not so good, use
it as a blueprint for change and make your child's experience a great one.
No matter how famous we are in this lifetime, in only two or three generations, there may be no living person who will remember us.
In time we become, just a name and date on a marker. Someone who, in twenty-five, fifty or one hundred years, may not even be remembered.
Enjoy the here and now...Tomorrow is not promised.
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Top-level comments on this article: (1 total)Good advice for the children at the end of the article. But will they ever read it?
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